The downside of Humiliation

Humiliation's Down Side - Shame

by Aramock

March 2025

Shame is learned, and humiliation breeds shame, which is a common and important emotion in submissives.

Humilation also has an element of fear and abuse associated with it. It highlights their worth within themselves and leads to acceptance of the worth their Dominant/Master gives them. Shame allows the submissive to be ostracized by others and accept the negative use and abuse of others.

Only with the grace of a Master's support and encouragement can the submissive alleviate the fear of social exclusion, which motivates them to behave in ways acceptable within their role. Such support from their Master offsets the submissive, seeing themselves as inherently flawed, removing the manifestation of thought that they are worthless.

Humiliation and shame can cause them to expect shaming from others, but they mustn't isolate themselves to avoid showing what they consider to be their flawed selves. The Dominant needs to watch for signs of and counter depression, eating disorders, and traumatic self-injury in humiliated enslaved people. Informed Masters must develop interventions when signs appear. It is important to separate the submissive for those things that she could do to cause herself harm and to describe themselves as an animal or object. A step to helping the submissive develop a sense of purpose and value within the eyes of her owner and, thereby, herself. A quantitative measure of self-worth she can build upon.

The key is having patience.

Having a slave say positive things about themselves undermines the goal of reinforcing those prone to shame and self-criticism. Doing so often triggers feelings of shame and self-loathing. They bristle at the idea that they are lovable since they were never treated as such. Hence, the Master must step in and do this for them. The enslaved person must first experience that feeling of warmth and get familiar with it. However, some scoffed at the naiveté of treating them with affection.

With practice, they change their views, accept the affection and reduce their need for hate and humiliation. By separating from and deconstructing their shame, do they truly start to understand that they have value? Compassion gives the vulnerable the ability to accept their weaknesses and flaws while they are fallible. It is only by being willing to make mistakes and learning from them that they can grow.