After-Care

by Aramock Nanuck

August 1978

Yes, the first section on punishment is about caring for someone after they have been punished. It is essential to know what you need to do to compensate for past actions before you begin. A dominant may need a prescription for spray Novocaine. It is the most effective topical anesthetic as it relieves overt sensitivity and is used to numb genitals, so people do not cum. Many doctors will prescribe this for that purpose.

Being Prepared

Sort of like a Boy Scout, you need to be prepared to treat injuries and your submissive, slave or masochist's emotional well-being to support the continuation of said experiences. The Dominant needs to go to the pharmacy and get a bottle of baby rash ointment or a medicated heat chaffing cream, preferably one with a mild aesthetic. Tell the pharmacist the Dominant has a child with a severe diaper/heat rash, and they are in quite a bit of suffering. The Dominant should also buy some latex gloves in sterile packs and light gauze.

To avoid infection, put on the gloves, apply the ointment to the gauze, and gently lay it over the striations. If the skin is cut, do not use the gauze but rub the ointment over the striations. If possible, have a bottle of spray novocaine, which is excellent to take the sting out of the harshest of marks.

Never use equipment that requires repair. Keeping items serviceable keeps them safe to use, and more importantly, keeps the acts sane and sensible.

Avoid Feeling Inexperienced

Avoid feeling like an inexperienced Dom/Domme. Do not disregard this phase, but if the Dominant is going to play with a recipient, this is critical. The Dominant needs to make sure the recipient has found total satisfaction in what the Dominant delivers. Secondly, the punishment the Dominant issues to the recipient is very much an act of dominance, control, and fulfillment of the recipient’s needs. Even though having severe sexual overtones is not missed, the conclusion of the punishment is only half of the process. The rest of the process is largely about the bonding that results from this and the structure of after-care, which highlights those bonds.

Meat or Matters

Sometimes, the Dominants, when a punished submissive is suffering and in pain, can visualize themselves as worthless and mere meat. If the Dominant ignores this, the feelings will persist, deepen, and eventually turn quite negative within the individual. The Dominant has the opportunity to relieve this and, in the process, take away their pain as easily as they gave it. This is where the real gift rests and the point at which it may manifest in sexual desire.

Many slaves actually get turned on by the punishment, but lose all resistance or inhibitions when aftercare commences. They say that punishment heightens their need to serve and must be mirrored by the joy the Dominant receives. Therefore, the Dominant should always cuddle, kiss, and cosset the recipient in the final stage of aftercare. This recognizes that discipline does not end when the last spank has been delivered.

Emotional Attachment through Care

Hence, the recipient’s aftercare is crucial in the effort to build an emotional attachment. The Dominant should always use encouraging and meaningful words during discipline; this sets the tone for aftercare that follows the punishment. Remind the recipient that it was a sexual experience for the Dominant. Her submission and receiving of her punishment, where she did no wrong to deserve it, was a gift of the highest order and aroused the Dominant. Let the recipient know that, as of this offer, the Dominant wishes to care for them, and let the Dominant's soothing efforts demonstrate that the recipient is loved. Many recipients enter a subspace during a session and therefore need to be gently brought back to their normal state after the session. The red mist clears slowly from the recipient's mind, and the Dominant should provide a comforting arm to support the recipient on the return from this state.

Psychological Care After Punishment

After punishment, care should be taken to ensure the mental well-being of the offender during the post-disciplinary recovery period. Mental care mitigates the negative emotional and behavioural consequences, reducing the chance of repeat offences. Fostering the perception that the household and relationship are a safe and sane environment improves acceptance of discipline as being corrective, not abusive.

Addressing Underlying Issues

The underlying cause of unacceptable behaviour may not be rebellion or a lack of attention by the offender, but rather a complete misunderstanding of expectations or a more self-destructive issue. The offender may be actively seeking punishment (particularly in repeat offences) to garner punishment. This may be that they crave the punishment, or worse, their feelings of self-worth have fallen so low that they believe they deserve nothing else. Overcoming underlying issues will take effort, dedication and thoughtful consideration on the part of the Dominant.

Building Trust and Rapport

Discipline may damage the relationship between the dominant and the offender, particularly if it is perceived as unjustified. Rebuilding trust occurs through emphasizing the behaviour adjustments needed to avoid future punishments and forgiveness, while providing continuing emotional support.

Trust is further enhanced by helping offenders understand why their behaviour was an issue, and discussing changes in behaviour builds strategies for positive change.

Emotional Impact

The aim should be to alleviate feelings of fear, anxiety, insecurity, and anger in the person being disciplined. Explaining what occurred, why, and the offences which led up to the discipline will change the focus from the punishment itself to correcting the actions which led to it.

Positive Reinforcement

If the goal is to correct the behaviour rather than relish in administering punishment (sadists are notorious for this), then the Dominant must emphasize positive reinforcement, praising desired behaviours, providing constructive feedback, and highlighting strengths and accomplishments.

Making it Effective

Addressing this from the recipient’s perspective. Recently, I trained a new Dominant and slave in the art of sexual punishment over the weekend. The slave was a true pain slut and took to it with relish. The Dominant was extremely reluctant to punish a slave without cause. So many barriers had to be overcome. I actually provided the first three punishments before the Dominant realized that after each session during the aftercare, the recipient always desires to have anal sex as a reward. They both the value/ joy of ass to mouth during those sessions. The Dominant realizes it was the totality of the act that so overwhelmed the recipient, and the responses were almost automatic in nature. The recipient's humiliation came later, when they realized they actually desired the punisher more than their Dominant, and this was discussed at length. The Dominant became aware of how proud the recipient was of taking the punishment and how fulfilling the result was; this broke down the last qualms about sexual punishment more than anything. The rest of the weekend, I introduced them to various forms, and each with the Dominant performing all of the efforts and aftercare.

The funny thing is that the hanging punishment is actually the most effective in ensuring the best orgasms with that. However, DO NOT try that unsupervised. Whenever a recipient is punished, they should receive aftercare for at least as long as the duration of the punishment, and it should always end with intercourse. The observer of the act should also acknowledge the recipient’s ability to receive the punishment. Still, it is advisable to leave during any sexual acts unless invited otherwise as these are very intense moments for both Dominant and recipient. The Dominant should clearly let the recipient know they are loved and were never left to think about punishment or to their own devices after it has been administered.

Conclusion

So taking this in stride… please use the aftercare to the level the Dominant wishes, but do NOT forget it.