Dominance Is...

by Aramock Nanuck

September 1996

Dominance is not an act, as it is an intellectual, philosophical, emotional, and thoughtful state.

The Appropriate Mix

Dominance entails conquest and requires effort, desire, and ability. If any of the three is missing, then the supremacy is at best lacklustre. True dominance does not come from whips or chains, but from torments and bonds that are much deeper. The best mind fuck is when true dominance takes the desire for independence and replaces it with total dependence.

Submission vs Surrender

A slave gives submission as a form of surrender, with choices after that residing with the dominant. One can offer submission, but doing so diminishes it. In fact, the submissive offers capitulation, but the dominant person accepts it, and in doing so, takes away the freedom from the submissive. This changes when surrender is not freely given but is compelled or forced from an individual and demanded by the dominating entity or situation. There is a fallacy in this lifestyle that the supplicant surrenders their freedom willingly. When forcing submission as a victim, dominance effectively grabs the throat with invisible hands, squeezing ever so tightly that the submissive realizes they have no options.

The Act of Owning

The taking of an individual as property requires control and, yes, even violence. The act of dominating needs to initiate with a rending of the soul, the mind, and self-image. The dominant shreds the parts of a submissive’s psyche, which are self-defining, replacing them with a structure and form suitable to the dominant's needs. The usurping of wills leaves the slave with a single path forward, and the return to "freedom" is impossible; there are no options left, only submission. The effect is why freed individuals, once emancipated, those with a truly "slavish mindset" always seek a return to the structure and control of submission in which they find comfort.

Stockholm Syndrome

Any true dominants know this; they practice a form of "Stockholm Syndrome" and take what they're by right of willpower. Now and forever. The human survival instinct is powerful, and when faced with overwhelming odds, individuals tend to either rebel forcibly or instinctively become diminutive as a function of survival and self-protection. Clinical psychology researchers found that the attachment of individuals to dominants occurred in all the "hostage" groups studied, including:

Lifestyle submissives,
Cult members,
Battered women,
Incest victims and
Those suffering from physical or emotional abuse.

There is no universally accepted definition of the Stockholm Syndrome, but there is agreement that observations demonstrate the following:

The captives, submissives and subjugated all hold:
Positive feelings towards his/her subjugator.
Negative feelings toward any individuals attempting to disengage them from the subjugation.

The subjugators generally develop:

Positive feelings towards their subjugated
Protective of their subjugated
Defensive of eternal interference.

It has been found to occur in circumstances where there is:

A threat to survival and a belief that the captor is willing to carry out that threat.
Some small kindness from the captor to the captive occurs within the context of terror.
Isolation from perspectives other than those of the captor.
Perceived an inability to escape.

Supplication versus being Prey or a Victim

Dominants within the lifestyle infuse much in candidate supplicants through a mix of terror and excitement. The submissive may at first feel victimized and possibly trapped or unable to escape. Thereby connecting their physical, psychological or even emotional well-being to their submission. A skillful dominant realizes that the supplicant needs nurturance and protection to process the terror and a sense of compliance to justify the excitement and avoid feeling victimized. Sometimes, isolation from others compels the victim to turn to the abuser. A healthier approach emerges when the relationship evolves into a group dynamic, where, simply as part of a community, they find following the pattern a sense of “normalcy.”

Kindness Bonds

The small kindness shown by the dominant creates hope and comfort within the subjugated. It allows the subjugated to overlook their overwhelming rage, which at times accompanies the abuse. They compartmentalize it, hide it, and accept the acts as normal or even fulfilling. This further bonds the subjugated to the dominant at a profound and emotional level.

Hope Reinforces Submission

Hope builds with every event, and the subjugated enthusiastically take on more acts to keep their dominator happy. Determined to build on the emotional bonding and needs of the subjugated, they begin to arrest their own needs, feelings, and perspectives. By prioritizing the self-worth and value of the Dominator over their own, they can unconsciously adopt the dominant perspective.

Role Definition

Now, the dominant becomes the "positive force," and those acting against the continuation of the situation become "negative forces." Over time, depending on the intensity of the problem, the entire sense of self becomes the dominant desire. This transformation results in the subjugated becoming a “slave” to the will of their “Master,” and if the opportunity arises to challenge the state, the slave ceases to have reason to do so.

Total Power Exchange

When a submissive never wants the limelight or openly interacts with people without instructions. They become casually involved in conversations at the request of others, yet never truly become wallflowers in social situations. The submission is now complete and total, a true power exchange.

The best and most successful Dom/Dommes are intelligent, thoughtful, analytical, and very practiced in the arts of cementing a supplicant's bond to them. This becomes the cornerstone of long-running relationships, avoiding the flight and return, or errant behaviour in submissives.