Transformations

by Aramock Nanuck

April 2003

Sexuality habitually intermixes in the perceptions of those inside and outside the lifestyle. Experience shows that the lifestyle and sexuality are as varied as the people involved. All people come with their perspectives and preferences. Some common interests and activities are often differentiated by the person's role when they are involved in them. Traditionalists within the lifestyle deliberately avoid using the word "play" because they assume it implies a way of living, rather than a game to be played. Here is the fundamental difference in distinguishing between reality and fantasy.

Reasons as Varied as People

There are many reasons, each particular to the person making a choice. No single criterion ever defined a single person. This interplay of emotions and rationalizations can contribute to the makeup of a dominant female's mind. There is never just one reason, but rather a combination of reasons that usually drives people to make the choices that result in transformation. In many cases, people evolve from one role to another, often finding little satisfaction in their former roles. (i.e., Submissive > Switch > Dominant, or the reverse of Dominant > Switch > Submissive)

So, then, why is it that most men struggle to understand a woman's mind? However, the contrary is also accurate and frequently overlooked in the form of reverse sexism. It is essential to consider the messages conveyed and the underlying meanings, without applying a cultural filter. Even I, at times, fail at this and cloud my interpretations by the experiences of a lifetime. The key is to try to avoid the weaknesses that lead to misinterpretations, thereby fostering a better understanding.

Driven to Lead

Some of the reasons driving the female psyche to assume control, which is the key in these relationships, are based on different motivations. There are those who:

Were abused at an early age, and view this as a way to:
- Get back the control they felt was ripped from them in childhood
- Get revenge on a male-dominated society
- Exercise control over the things which they can
- Drive out (expel or exorcise) their internal demons
- Change the course of their destiny.
Became enamoured with the concepts and literature of the lifestyle
- Want to go beyond the norms of a "vanilla" (every day) existence
- Experience the various perversions in a safe manner
- Enjoy the concept of "Total Control."
- Experience something different from their mundane lives
As they got older (35+), they found something missing in their lives
- Wanting to explore the perceived missing elements in one's life
- Infuse their lives with adventure
- Sample a random yet selective group of partners, where before they could not
Experience a decisive "female" role driven by pictures of everything from Wonder Woman to their idealizations that they have developed through social and private media.
Sometimes, we use DOMINANCE merely as a method to hide their inherent weakness.
Extend the natural dominance they already have in work or family life to a more active and powerful lifestyle role.

Literature as a Guide

As to HOW…. In today's world, the proliferation, as you pointed out, on the web, in literature, and even in classical movies ("Gone with the Wind" or "Cleopatra," to start), as well as in comics like "Wonder Woman," and the more adventurous literature, gives ample exposure. It is easy enough to find through the use of websites or chat channels.

As to Happiness

Control is a potent narcotic and even more so if mixed with sexual fulfillment. It is easy to find "satisfaction," if not happiness, in the experiences of those who are genuine and live this lifestyle. Introduce some kink or activity-based items, and they quickly become ingrained in one's sense of fulfillment. As humans, let's be honest; it's just a complex mix of emotions, desires, and needs that equally drive our satisfaction.